About Those Resolutions

A Different Take on New Years Resolutions

We All Know The Pattern

I was a member of a commercial gym for several years. I used it quite regularly; I liked how I felt after exercising, the staff was very good, and the facility was excellent. While I was often there several times a week all year, I was not to be seen in January. For January was that time wherein the gym was full of new users, some who received gift memberships for Christmas, but most who had made New Years Resolutions to get in shape.

The place was crowded with new users, but by Valentines Day, usually even earlier than that, they had run their course and were gone. I had my gym back for the next 11 months. Pretty well all of us have been in such a population at one time or another. We make a resolution and shortly fall off the wagon and fail to accomplish our goal. There are some steps to ameliorate that trend, including making very different types of resolutions.

Three Steps to Make Better, Useful Resolutions

Most resolutions aim to make us better people in some way – lose weight, stop smoking, read more, etc. These are based on tasks or actions to achieve a certain goal. If that is your type of resolution under consideration, do the following three things to increase your odds of success.

• Make It Measurable – Se some sort of benchmark that can demonstrate real progress, not just a feeling. Look at X number minutes of exercise, X days per week, for example. Aim to loose two pounds a week, or to read 20 pages a day from a book. Give yourself something that indicates progress toward your goal.
• Be Realistic – People sometimes demand too much of themselves, or set goals that are too general to carry out well. Saying I will exercise 1 hour every day, all week is a bit much for most of us. How about starting with 15 minutes, every other day for2 months, then see if you want to add time or frequency. Start with small steps and gain small victories. Build on that progression, rather than going for gold right off the bat.
• Be Gentle on Yourself – If this really is an important goal, you will want to do it and to challenge yourself a bit in doing so. We already said we want to be realistic, but we do want to challenge ourselves enough to progress. That means, almost by definition that every effort will not be a success.
  • Do not let a failure or a setback throw you off the hunt for victory. Get back to it, accomplish the next goal, and keep improving. The occasional setback is just verification that you have set a goal that is challenging – good for you. Drive on!

Three Better Types of Resolutions

How about a different kind of resolution altogether, one that focuses less on shortcomings and self-improvement and more on celebrating life? Try one or more of these three for a better New Year (and, as it turns out, a better you).

• Gratitude – The basic idea was quite popular a couple of years ago online, and has much older roots, of course. One sets aside a quiet moment at the same time every day (usually at the start of your day but anytime is fine) to think about something or someone that earns your gratitude. It could be something very personal or a much more generic element.
  • It could be anything – seeing a sunrise, someone who did you a favor, a tasty treat – you name it. Resolve to do this every day. Consider writing it down and forming a list; you might be surprised to find a pattern over time of what makes you grateful.
• Thanks – One of the neatest things I read about years ago was a fellow who went to a local store every week and bought a package of thank you notes. He took them home and put them in the top right drawer of his desk. His mission was to have used all the cards by the end of the week, sending people snail mail, handwritten notes of appreciation for something they did (even a long time ago), something they said, or simply who they are.
  • Today one could do this with email as well, although taking the trouble of penning a note says you REALLY thought this was worthy of your thanks. Resolve to specifically thank people on a schedule that becomes part of your daily life.
• Continue With Fun, Pleasure – Resolutions do not have to be about improvements or new learning. Why not a commitment to do more of something you love or something that just makes you feel good?
  • I resolve to go for a walk in the woods deep enough to see no people and hear no cars, at least twice a month.
    
  • I resolve to, at least once a month, when going through a fast food drive through, to pay the tab for the car behind me.
    
  • I resolve to go to a favorite hardware store at least once a month just to play with a new tool I did not know about and to smell fresh sawdust.

You get the idea. Commit to doing something you already know and love, but just want to do more of it. Make that a commitment, one that is just as important as a resolution to lose weight or master a new language. Recognize the power and value of pleasure of the simplest variety.

It Will Soon Be 2025

Like it or not, the New Year is upon us. There is much to worry about and much to deal with in this coming year. Much of it will be troubling and deadly serious. Use some resolutions as we have discussed today to make yourself a more complete and better human being. You will be glad you did – and the rest of us need you in good shape to deal with 2025!

See you next week. Look for high drama politically next week. The Republicans need to elect the Speaker of the House, certify the national election, and start hearings for nominees. What could possibly go wrong?!

               Bill Clontz

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